


Losing Control

by UndertheWeather15



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:42:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 14,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27386632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UndertheWeather15/pseuds/UndertheWeather15
Summary: Taking place in the alternate timeline, like Apocalypse and Dark Phoenix and all that.Jean Grey has been struggling with her nightmares for quite some time. But each time they only seem to get worse and worse. She's become quite concerned about her own powers, which she found were quickly starting to get out of control. It seems her own panic and fear is only escalating the situation, thus insists on isolating herself.
Relationships: Jean Grey & Charles Xavier, Jean Grey/Scott Summers
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

Bright, violent images sped across her field of view. Explosions and screams rang in her ears, flowing around her, taunting her. She wanted desperately for these loud, deafening voices to disappear, for these torturous images to never show themselves again.

She never asked for this. Why was this happening to her? She was getting better. She thought she was getting better.

Another image, this one so disturbing she couldn't even begin to describe it.

She screamed for it to stop, for this hellish nightmare to disappear and for her to reawaken in the real world.

Jean Grey bolted upright in the 'Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters.' Sweat beaded her head as she scanned her surroundings. A violent shiver was sent through her body as she slowly lifted her hands up to her field of view, noticing how they shook from the nightmare she had just experienced.

What was more unsettling to her, was how more intense it was than her previous one. 

Swallowing tightly, Jean Grey slowly sat herself up on her bed, gazing out of the window and into the still-dark sky of the world. By now, her quick and uneven breathing had begun to settle. 

It wasn't real...

It wasn't real.

She repeated that phrase to herself like a mantra, something she commonly did after a nightmare.

Obviously, she hadn't managed to sleep long. The pitch black sky gave hint of that. 

But she knew she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep anytime soon. In all honesty, she was terrified to shut her eyes again. So she headed toward the kitchen to grab a midnight snack, something she hoped would calm her down.

Once she reached the kitchen, she used her telepathy to switch on the lights. She had to blink her eyes a few times to adjust to the sudden brightness, but after a few moments her vision cleared and she stepped deeper into the room.

"Ugh.." She grumbled, rubbing her tired eyes. The past week had been extremely rough on her. Likely the cause of her lack of sleep. The nightmares were a different story, because she's been having them for weeks. Probably up to a month at this point. 

Not even grabbing a snack, she just sat down at the table and held her head in her hands. She sat like that for a few moments and eventually lost track of how long she had been sitting there.

"Jean?"

The familiar voice snapped her out of whatever trance she had landed in. Her head snapped up in alertness as her eyes landed on Scott's form leaning against the door frame. He blinked from behind his visor and stepped forward.

But she knew that he knew why she was up this late, thus why he didn't bother to ask why she was sitting in the kitchen in the middle of the night.

"Nightmare?" He asked, coming up to sit beside her. Her gaze stayed glued to the empty space in front of her. She gave a stiff nod.

"They..they just won't go away.." She said, looking up at Scott with tears in her eyes. "I don't know why..they just keep getting worse and worse and I—" 

She stopped mid-sentence, her tongue tied on the emotions threatening to spill out of her all at once. 

Scott's face visibly softened as he rested a hand against her cheek. "Hey.."

Jean blinked sluggishly and finally looked up at him. 

"It's okay to be scared," He said. "I've had nightmares before, too. Of course, probably nothing like the extent you're experiencing, but I've been scared before too. We all have."

Jean slowly nodded, her eyes drifting downward. It was something she often did to avoid looking at someone.

"If it gets bad, talk to the Professor," Scott said. "I know he would gladly help you."

Jean shuddered and looked away. 

But what if he doesn't think I can be helped?

No, stupid thought. Charles would help anyone in need, even a human. He had practically raised her.

Knowing what she was thinking about, Scott squeezed her hand. "You're not helpless or weak. You're the strongest person I know."

Jean couldn't help but let a small smile slip by at that. Scott patted her shoulder. "Come on, try to get some sleep."

Jean smiled and whispered a small, "okay," before heading up to her room. Her stomach still sank with fear and anxiety as she laid down on the soft bed, but she tried to push it aside.

You're okay..

You're okay..

Sighing, she slowly slid her eyes closed and was asleep instantly.


	2. Chapter 2

It came as no surprise that the nightmares returned the following night. This time even worse than the last, and by the time she jolted awake, half of her room had been damaged by what she assumed were her powers.

Shaking, she sat up, breathing heavily as she looked around the room.

What did she do?

A few tears escaped from her eyes as she covered her face with her hands. And a few minutes later her door creaked open and she heard the familiar sound of wheels rolling across the floor.

She looked up, half surprised and not surprised to see Charles roll up next to her, a very concerned expression on his face. He took a quick glance around the room, his expression saddening evening more before turning his attention to Jean.

"I'm sorry..." She whispered, side glancing at the damage. "I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't," Charles replied softly. "It's fixable."

"I'm not," Jean muttered under her breath, but Charles caught it. He was psychic anyway so he could have easily read her mind.

"Of course you are," Charles said in what seemed like disbelief. "It just takes time."

"But what if I don't get better?"

The professor's eyes softened and he rolled closer. "Lie back."

Hesitating, Jean leaned back onto the soft pillows as Charles maneuvered himself from his wheelchair to the side of the bed. He'd done this with her plenty of times before after a nightmare. A bit too many to count.

He leaned down, resting his hand on the side of her head and brushing his finger across it to calm her. He tried using as less telepathic tactics as he could, because he noticed, after a while, it makes things a bit worse.

"You will get better, Jean," He said, his lips slowly curving into a smile. "Sometimes it just takes awhile."

Jean was silent.

The next day the nightmares were even worse. She woke up with a startled cry and started to sob seconds later. The damage had also increased as well and she looked at her own hands with growing fear. 

Charles, of course, had sensed the disturbance and was there fairly quickly. He rolled over to the bed and reached out to grab her hands. "Jean!"

She looked up, tears rolling down her eyes. Not much of Charles' comforting words could calm her down, so he did the same thing he did the day previous, maneuvering himself onto the bed.

"Come here.." He whispered, reaching out and pulling Jean into an embrace. She wrapped her arms around him and broke out into terrified sobs. 

"Why is this happening to me?"

In Charles' own honesty, he had no answer to that question. He had no idea why this was happening to her, whether it was her powers or her own genuine fear.

"What if I hurt someone?"

Charles' pulled back, grabbing her wrist and squeezing. "You won't.."

Jean swallowed hard and stared downward at the blankets covering her legs. She couldn't bear to look at anyone right now. Not without breaking all over again.

"I'm sorry.."

"You have nothing to apologize for."

"I destroyed the room. Again."

"It's an easy fix."

Jean let a small smile break past her saddened features and Charles did the same as he carefully maneuvered himself back to his wheelchair. 

"Get some sleep, Jean. You need it."

And then he was gone.

She sat there for few minutes before she laid back down, falling off into a rare, dreamless sleep. But she knew it wouldn't last.

The next day she hung out with Scott and Hank. For a while, it was fine. And she had forgotten all about the nightmares that had been plaguing her for the past month.

Until it wasn't.

Her head had suddenly began to pound, and it seemed the sound was getting louder and louder to drive her insane. She lifted her hands up to her head, eyes squeezing shut as Scott and Hank looked on in concern.

"Jean?" Scott asked, stepping forward. "Jean, what's wrong?"

"Stay back.." She whispered, eyes squinting open for only a second before shutting again. "Stop it.."

Hank was about to step forward when all hell broke loose.

A large wave of energy shot out and threw both Scott and Hank to the complete opposite end of the room, knocking them both out for, likely, a while. And just like that, the pounding was gone.

Jean wobbled, just managing to catch a glimpse of them before she tumbled to the ground, chest rising and falling in heaving breaths. She was still grappling on to consciousness, but after that sudden outburst, her body was utterly drained and weak. Not to mention practically everything in the room was destroyed.

She wasn't sure when Charles or anyone else arrived, because when she came to again she was still on the floor, except Charles was leaning over her, face slightly red as if he had been struggling but otherwise fine. 

"Jean? What happened?"

She opened her mouth to speak, but quickly clamped it shut to avoid an unwanted sob escaping her throat.

Charles's face saddened as he looked up, and soon Hank and Scott came into view. 

Jean's eyes widened. "'m sor—"

"Hey, it's fine," Hank said, kneeling down next to her. "Here," he lended his hand, which Jean took as he pulled her into a sitting position.

"I'm sorry—" She choked. "I don't know what happened."

"It's okay," Scott reassured. "Just calm down. We'll figure this out."

"Hank?" Charles asked. Said mutant turned to him, eyebrow raising. 

"Do you mind doing some tests on Jean? We need to figure out what's going on." 

Hank nodded. "Sure." 

Hank knelt down and helped Jean to her feet. Charles looked after them as they walked toward the medical area. 

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. He only hoped they could prevent this from getting any worse.


	3. Chapter 3

After quite a while, Jean was finally convinced by Charles and Scott to get out of the school for a little while. Charles didn't mind her missing out on some of her classes, because her well-being was way more important than that.

She hopped in the car with Scott and Alex and they headed off to drive around the county. They talked and chatted and for a moment it felt like Jean was living a normal life; hanging out with friends, exploring, making jokes and laughing hysterically at them even though the majority were stupid. She enjoyed it.

The wind rushing passed her face made her feel more at peace with the world. All the thoughts about the nightmares she had been having disappeared in that moment. 

They were out for a few hours, stopping at some place where they grabbed some ice cream. All in all, it was absolutely delicious.

She should do this more often. 

By the time they got back to the mansion, the sun had set beneath the horizon. The car pulled through the large gate that stood at the front of the property. They drove up to the doors, where Jean noticed it was extremely quiet.

Of course, the majority of students were probably asleep, but she just had a hunch. She didn't need her powers to know that something was wrong.

"You alright, Jean?" Scott asked, noticing her split-second of hesitation to exit the vehicle. 

She hesitated once again before she finally exited. "Yeah..'m fine."

Scott and Alex both looked like they didn't believe her but seemed to just shrug it off and leave it be, not wanting to push her.

Despite her hesitation, Jean was the first to step forward, resting her hand on the wooden handle. It sat there for a moment before she wrapped her fingers around it and pulled. The large doors opened with a small creaking sound. 

When Jean looked in, initially she saw nothing but the dim lights lighting the dark hallways. For the most part, it was empty, so they stepped in. 

"Professor! We're back!" Scott shouted into the empty hallways. 

"Scott, shout any louder and you'll wake the whole school," Alex said. If he hadn't already woken everybody up.

The younger of the two brothers simply rolled his eyes from behind his glasses. But both were concerned when they didn't get a reply back. Even if it was telepathic.

Jean shuddered as a sudden cool breeze swept through the mansion. It was unusual, because from what she knew, all the windows were shut.

Then the lights clicked off and they were plunged into darkness. She let out a startled shout, and as quickly as the lights had flickered off, they lit up the hallways once again.

Except this time Scott and Alex were gone.

Her stomach dropped in utter fear as she stared at the spots where they had been only 5 seconds before. "Scott?!"

"Alex?!" She yelled, looking around. Even using her powers, she couldn't feel them. It's like they had disappeared completely.

But that wasn't right.

Swallowing hard, she stepped further into the eerily empty school. Hopefully, she'd be able to find the Professor. Maybe he'd know what was going on.

"Professor?" She shouted, listening as her voice bounced off of the walls. 

She walked up the stairs, glancing around with unease. 

Something was wrong.

When she got to the second floor, she felt like the whole earth just disappeared from under her. The lights were brighter up here, whether it be on purpose for her to easily make out the bodies littering the floor or they just happen to be that way.

"No.."

Already, Jean felt the tears stinging her eyes. Despite herself, she continued forward, careful to not step on the broken and bloodied bodies below her.

How did this happen?

WHY did this happen?

Now, her concern for the Professor's health and safety skyrocketed.

"Professor!" She shouted, this time louder, praying, oh just praying he could hear her.

It was only a few seconds later a pitifully weak reply answered from somewhere ahead of her.

"Jean.."

Her heart stopped for what must have been the hundredth time. She rushed forward, finally spotting the Professor whom was propped up against the wall, blood covering half of his face and his front.

Jean's knees gave way immediately and she slid the rest of the way over. 

"Oh god..Oh-" Her hands shook as they hovered mid-air. She didn't know what to do, there was just so much-

His eyes were squeezed shut, indicating the immense amount of pain he was likely experiencing. She reached her hand out to the side of his face, trying to get his attention.

"Professor, what happened?"

Charles' eyes slowly fluttered open, drifting up to Jean's face. His expression went solemn, chest heaving, as a sudden voice in the back of Jean's head said, 

"You did this."

Almost immediately afterward, Charles' trembling lips parted. "It..w-wasn't your fault.."

Jean felt like someone just plunged a sword through her stomach.

"Jean..."

Her eyes had shot open in absolute horror, she turned, once again, to glance at the bodies spread across the hall and the blood staining the floor.

A sob tore out of her throat. "I-I didn't- I didn't mean-"

"I know.." Charles whispered.

And then she was suddenly standing up, with Charles' eyes following her movements, before suddenly widening.

"Jean-"

She lost all conscious control of her body, and in the back of her mind she was screaming.

She moved her hand forward, then tilted it upward violently and watched as Charles' body went rigid.

"PROFESSOR-"

Jean Grey bolted up in her bed with such startling ferocity that Hank and Charles nearly jumped out of their skin.

"Holy-" Hank fell with a light thud, eyes shooting open.

"Jean-" Charles rolled over to her, grabbing her arm to calm her down. "Jean, look at me. You're safe."

Jean gasped, her breathing slowly starting to return to normal as she snapped her head in Charles's direction, staring at him with such terror that it honestly hurt him inside.

Her hand wrapped around his wrist, squeezing tightly as she tried to steady herself.

"S-Sorry..I'm sorry-" She stuttered.

"It's quite alright," Charles replied gently. "You didn't hurt anyone."

A sigh of relief escaped Jean, before the full extent of the dream came back to her and she quickly found her eyes stinging with tears.

Hank stepped forward, resting his hand on her back. "It's okay, Jean..It was just a dream," although he had a feeling it was more than that.

"It wasn't just a dream, Hank," Jean said albeit angrily. "These nightmares won't stop and I don't know why! They're just getting worse and worse and I can't.."

A sob escaped her throat and she buried her face in her hands. "I just want it to stop."

Hank and Charles looked at each other with saddened looks before Charles maneuvered himself onto the bed, rubbing her shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hank suggested. He knew it usually helped him when he talked about his own dreams, though he doubted it would be the same for Jean. She was different.

Jean just shook her head and went silent, staring almost lifelessly at the floor.

Hank nodded. "I'll be in my lab.."

Charles nodded and watched as Hank left the room, then turned back to Jean.

"You will get better, Jean," He insisted. "It takes time."

Jean looked over at him, her eyes almost completely dull, as if she was just bent on giving up completely. In some ways it scared Charles because in all the years she had spent with him, since she was a child, she had never looked this lifeless before.

"Here, lie down.." He gently nudged her shoulder as she lowered herself back onto the bed. 

He leaned down, gently resting his hand on the side of her face. "Relax.." 

Her shoulders visibly relaxed, even while she was laying down, and she was asleep within a few seconds.

Xavier gave the sleeping girl a small smile, sitting there and watching her for a few moments, feeling horribly bad for someone so innocent having to suffer this much trauma. Then, he quietly maneuvered himself back into his wheelchair and rolled back outside, shutting the door gently behind him.


	4. Chapter 4

"One of the children have come down with something."

"What?" Jean asked, both her in Scott looked at Hank in surprise. "Like what?"

"I'm not sure, but it's pretty serious. They're being put in isolation until I can figure out whether or not it's contagious."

"Does the Professor know about this?" Scott asked.

Hank nodded in reply. "I told him a few hours ago. He's keeping an eye on the others to make sure, if this is contagious, that they don't display any of the same symptoms."

Jean nodded, though a bit nervous. How serious? What were the symptoms? How did they come down with it?

With that, Jean and Scott went back upstairs. The school was eerily silent. Classes had been cancelled because of this new predicament. Charles found it safer that way, and Jean agreed with him. 

It was only a few days later that 3 more kids had to be isolated. Yes, this disease was indeed contagious, which they had found out by the increasing number of children who were becoming infected.

Hank had yet to figure out if this affected any specific mutants in any particular fashion based on their power. And that, according to him, would take a while. So they mostly spent the day in their rooms, or outside where there was plenty of space and open, fresh air.

Jean was sitting on her bed, writing in her own personal notepad. It was like a diary of sorts. She decided to try it since there seemed to be nothing else to do now that the entire school was practically on quarantine.

Scott was with her, sitting in a chair in the corner of the room closest to the door, reading a book, though he seemed as bored as she was.

Scott groaned. "I know this is for our safety. But isn't there anything that we can do?"

Jean shook her head. "According to what Hank told me, nothing yet. It'll take awhile to try to come up with a vaccine and we might have to let it run its course and disappear."

"You sure it'll just disappear?" Scott asked, uncertainty in his tone. 

Jean shrugged. "That's what Hank said."

Scott sighed and continued his reading, but eventually settled to just scribbling around in one of his class notebooks.

Jean glanced up at him every once in a while with a very faint smile on her face. Thankfully, Scott paid no attention and just continued on with his pointless scribbles.

That's what they did for hours on end. Eventually, the sun set and it got dark, which meant Scott had to return to his room.

Jean was still terrified about shutting her eyes. Ever since Charles had helped send her off to sleep a few days ago, her nightmares had been a lot less frequent. That didn't make it any less scary trying to sleep, though. It was just as terrifying. 

Her anxiety spiking again, Jean slowly lowered herself onto her bed to sleep. It was pretty late and she could feel her eyelids drooping with exhaustion. 

As soon as she woke up the following morning, she knew something was wrong.

When she opened her eyes, she was definitely aware of how blurred her vision was, along with the sweat dripping down her forehead and onto the collar of her t-shirt. Her muscles ached extremely badly and she could barely move.

And she knew she had caught whatever was going around.

A low groan escaped her throat as she shifted uncomfortably. She was stuck laying there for hours on end. Scott never showed up, so she assumed he had caught it too. 

Due to her lack of mobility, she was unable to get up and to get herself food or water. Which was quite worrisome to her, saying that she didn't want anyone near her.

It was about 7 pm when there was a gentle knock at her door. Hank's voice rang through. 

"Jean? Are you alright? I haven't seen you all day."

"Don't come in here.." Jean muttered, wiping the sweat off of her forehead. "Think I caught whatever was going around.."

She heard Hank silently swear to himself at the other side of the door. "Alright. I'm trying to work on something that'll hopefully make it less and hopefully no longer contagious so that I can properly treat you."

"Okay.." She rasped.

"By the way, you sound horrible."

"Yeah, I've figured that out."

Hank laughed before she heard footsteps receding away from the door.

Even though her throat was deathly dry, her whole body hurt, she had a really bad headache, and she was starving, she decided to try to get some sleep.

Sleep, with all those combinations, would probably not end well.

She was right. Because she had just about the worst nightmare she's had so far. It affected her badly enough that her powers sent everything in her room flying and the majority of the windows in the school shattering into tiny pieces.

After the violent outburst, she collapsed back onto her bad, feeling too exhausted to even think about guilt right now. She felt nothing, but didn't fail to notice how her breaths were coming in shorter spurts.

Jean just wanted to sleep.

But she knew she couldn't.

So she laid there for god knows how long before the door slowly creaked open. Hank entered with a syringe in hand and Charles wasn't far behind.

"But won't you get infected?" Jean asked, voice hoarse.

"Yeah, maybe," Hank replied. "But I won't be contagious."

Jean nodded in understanding as Hank made his way over. Charles stayed a relatively safe distance back as Hank slid the syringe into Jean's arm. 

The reaction they got was not what they were expecting. At all.

Immediately after Hank pulled the syringe out, Jean let out a loud, high-pitched screech. Immediately, a shockwave brought the wall to her room down completely, along with the a large chunk of the roof, as Charles and Hank were blown backward a great distance.

Jean was on her feet in a second, still screeching, until she finally calmed down and collapsed to her knees in exhaustion. Her vision cleared and she looked around at the destruction she had caused.

"Oh no.."

She was out the door in a second, seeing the debris littering the hallway.

"Hank?! Professor?!"

But they were nowhere in sight. She caught sight of some of the other kids running for the door in panic, as if the whole building was going to collapse on top of them in a matter of seconds.

She knew Charles could be way more seriously injured than Hank. Likely due to the fact he's paralyzed and was probably thrown from his wheelchair.

"Professor?!"

"Jean, over here!" She heard Hank call out. He sounded worried and a bit fearful which only worried Jean even more. If she had seriously injured Charles because of her damn powers—

When she reached them, her heart dropped to the pit of her stomach.

Charles was on his stomach with a chunk of the roof, which had apparently fallen on him, over his back. And from what she could tell, there was blood dripping onto the floor from his shoulder.

"Oh—"

She rushed forward and landed on her knees beside Hank.

"I-I'm so sorry..I'm so sorry-" She whispered frantically, using her telepathy to move the heavy object off of the Professor.

That stirred a weak groan as Charles tried to lift his head. Hank quickly grabbed him and turned him onto his back, where his eyes drifted up to Jean'a face.

Hank turned and noticed the distressed expression on her face and placed a hand on her shoulder, but she flinched away.

"Don't—I don't want to hurt you."

"It wasn't your fault.." Hank said, knowing exactly what the troubled telepath was thinking.

Jean shook her head as tears formed in her eyes. "How could it not? These are my powers and all I manage to do is hurt people with them!"

"That's not true.." Charles rasped from below them. Hank, surprised by his sudden intervention, helped sit him up against the wall.

"But I hurt you," Jean said, scared and confused.

"Oh, trust me. I've had worse than this," Charles replied with a smile. "I'll be alright."

"I think I better check you out just in case," Hank said, glancing down at Charles. 

The Professor nodded, keeping his eyes on Jean for a moment longer before Hank was helping him up. Jean managed to find Charles's wheelchair and levitated it over silently before walking away.

Hank and Charles looked after her with solemn expressions.

"I'm worried about her.." Hank admitted, not tearing his eyes away from the spot Jean disappeared from.

"I am as well," Charles sighed. "It does seem like her nightmares are getting worse. And her powers are growing tremendously stronger."

Hank nodded his head in agreement.

A moment later someone screamed.


	5. Chapter 5

Hank spun around in a flash, his eyes widening at the sudden high-pitched sound.

Charles was just as startled, spinning around in his wheelchair and rolling toward the doors that would lead to the outside world. Hank followed. 

When they reached the doors, Hank threw them open and they both headed outside, only to stop at the sight before them.

Jean was hovering over Scott, who had fallen to the ground. His eyes were darting toward Jean and then over toward Hank and the Professor.

There was another body lying not far from where Scott lay. Unfortunately, whoever it was met an untimely death.

Jean, who was emitting a strong, orange aura around her body, stared down at Scott with fierce eyes. It was clear she had lost complete control.

"Hank, get Scott," Charles said.

Hank nodded and rushed toward Cyclops. Charles then looked up at Jean, trying to get into her head to try to calm her down, but she was blocking him out completely.

"Jean!"

Ignoring Hank and Scott, Jean slowly turned to face him. Her hair was floating behind her, as if she were underwater or in space. It was a startling sight.

"Jean, listen to me. You must calm down," Charles tried to coax, but none of his attempts proved successful.

Her hand suddenly turned over, and Charles found himself being lifted out of his wheelchair. 

"Jean-!"

Hank grabbed Scott's hand and yanked him up. After assessing and making sure he was alright, Hank turned back toward the Professor and Jean.

"Charles!"

The telepath ignored them, staring fearlessly into Jean's glowing eyes. 

"Listen to me. This is not you," Charles insisted, voice strong and determined to bring her back to reality. "You need to control it, Jean. I know you can."

The girl hesitated for a moment, a few tears forming in her eyes as she suddenly realized what she was doing.

The glow in her eyes slowly began to fade. 

"Professor I'm so so—" 

"I know," Charles gave a small smile as Jean gently lowered both of them to the ground, helping Xavier back into the wheelchair.

"Jean-"

She turned around and saw Scott and Hank both looking at her. Both looking surprised and relieved at the same time. But her eyes drifted passed them to the body on the ground.

"I-I.."

Hank rushed forward before she could fall.

The sudden loss of consciousness startled Scott and Charles. 

"Is she okay?" Scott asked, kneeling down next to her as his eyebrows raised.

Hank looked over at Charles, who had a hand at the side of his head. He looked intently focused as he narrowed his eyes.

Eventually, he sighed and shook his head. "I still can't read her. Somethings blocking her mind."

Hank sighed. "Scott, help me get her to her room."

Scott nodded.

A few hours later, Charles and Hank were at Jean's bedside. She was still unconscious, but it wasn't a surprise to either of them.

Charles had his hand on her arm, eyes closed, trying to see into her mind. At this point, he could since her walls were down, but it was definitely worrisome.

Currently, her mind was filled with rage and pain. Which was something he did not like to see. Who knew what kind of state she'd be in when she woke up.

He glanced over at Hank nervously as he kept his hand on her wrist. He didn't have to say anything for Hank to get the gist.

It was a few minutes before Jean started to stir. She sat up abruptly, eyes shooting open in blind panic before Charles grabbed onto her arm.

"Jean."

Her head snapped toward him before her heavy breathing started to subside. 

But the realization of what had taken place only hours before was permanently marked into her brain.

"I killed someone-"

"It wasn't your fault," Hank was quick to pitch in. "It wasn't. You weren't in control."

"I should be able to control it," Jean replied, glancing down at her own hands. Hank could make out the small tremors in her body, along with her eyes suddenly turning a light orange. 

Charles shook his head. "Not everybody is able to control their powers at first, Jean. It takes patience."

"People are going to get hurt because of me.." She whispered.

"Jean.." Hank warned. "Jean, calm down-"

Xavier was starting to notice the sudden change as well. 

"I killed someone!" She cried. "How am I supposed to stay calm when I killed someone? I didn't just hurt them I killed them—"

The orange in her eyes was growing more noticeable. The aura was starting to return as well as she brought her hands up to her head. 

Indistinctive voices rang through her head, coming at her from every direction as if taunting her, mocking her for being too feeble to be able to control her powers. It was getting the best of her, and before she knew it she was verbally yelling for it to stop, while faintly hearing Hank and Charles calling her name, trying to get her to calm down. Though, as much as she tried, it was useless. 

"Stop..stop it.." She squinted her eyes closed. "Stop it!"

Suddenly, the windows and the wall were completely blown out. Jean screamed as the large amount of energy was released, then everything went black.


	6. Chapter 6

When Jean came to, she was in the same place she had passed out in. 

Blinking sluggishly, she took in her surroundings, along with the collapsed wall. Her head was pounding, it was almost impossible to focus on anything.

She closed her eyes and rubbed her temple before once again slowly opening her eyes. 

"Hank?!" She shouted, voice fearful.

Why does she keep doing this? No ones safe around her. One day she's going to kill someone else. Perhaps someone closer to her. Like Hank or the Professor. 

Or Scott.

She couldn't imagine losing Scott.

Jean swallowed roughly as she looked around at the debris littering the ground. Chances are both Charles and Hank had been pushed through the current opening that used to be a wall when she lost control. Faintly, she heard some of the children downstairs. They were likely keeping themselves hidden, in case this was some sort of attack.

To her it felt like one. Except she was the attacker.

Jean quickly rushed downstairs and out the door, desperately searching for Hank or Charles. The drop wasn't small. She could assume Hank would only have minor injuries because of his mutation, but Charles on the other hand had multiple disadvantages in this situation.

"Professor?!" She shouted. "Hank?!"

"Jean?"

She spun around and saw Scott rushing toward her. 

"Jean, what happened? Are you okay?"

Instinctively, the girl took a step back. "D-Don't...I'll hurt you."

"I know, Jean.." Scott whispered. "You wouldn't."

"I-I hurt..I hurt Hank and the Professor—I don't know where they are."

Scott's eyebrows shot up as he looked among the crippled debris. His attention quickly turned back to Jean when he realized she was sobbing.

"Hey, hey..Jean," He rested his hand on her shoulder and pulled her close. She kept her arms glued at her sides, but he didn't care.

"It's not your fault."

"You don't understand!" Jean said, pushing him back. "I've hurt them multiple times. Especially the Professor. I don't know how any of them can still trust me! I'm unpredictable."

"Because they're your friends," Scott replied. "They care about you. Especially Charles."

Jean swallowed, then diverted her attention back toward the debris as she walked forward. "I gotta—Charles is probably really-I need to find them.."

Scott nodded and followed her. Jean knew she could easily use her powers to sense them, but she was too terrified to even think about using them right now. Although she knew she wouldn't be given a choose at some point. Because it would come back and take control again. And she wanted to make sure she was near no one when that happened.

"Jean,"

Jean looked toward Scott, her eyes then following his gaze to the crumpled wheelchair a few feet ahead of them. But the Professor wasn't in sight.

Jean rushed forward anyway, eyes darting around worriedly. She must have flung them farther than she thought. Which made her feel even more guilty.

She looked around again, and she wished she could wipe the memory of what she saw out of her head. 

"Oh my god."

She was rushing forward before Scott could even ask what was wrong. 

Jean fell to her knees beside the unconscious Professor, who had a piece of wood lodged in his side. From the outside, it didn't look fatally deep, though who knew what the damage was inside. But she knew it was serious. There was blood covering the side of his shirt, along with the grass below him.

"Oh god," Scott muttered, kneeling next to her. 

Jean looked up with terrified eyes. "Find Hank.."

Scott immediately nodded and ran off as quickly as he could, while Jean sat at Charles's side.

"Professor I'm so sorry.." She sobbed. If she lost him because of her own powers she'd never forgive herself. "Professor—"

She gently touched the visible piece of wood, which stirred a low groan from the Professor, who's eyelids were beginning to flutter.

Jean felt the tears stinging her eyes. And as much as she felt uncomfortable being alone with him, especially in this state, she needed to make sure he would be okay.

Hesitantly, she reached out and grabbed his hand, almost immediately getting a tight grip in response.

She didn't deserve this.

Didn't deserve people who cared about her so much when she hurt them over and over again, nearly to the point of death.

Xavier's eyes fluttered open. He let out a short cry of pain as his grip instinctively tightened on Jean's hand. Any small shift of movement was incredibly painful.

Sensing her presence, his head slowly turned toward her. She didn't fail to notice how shallow his breaths were. Every inhale probably triggered immense pain.

"Jean.."

She blinked multiple times as tears continued to fill her eyes. Some escaping and dripping down her face.

"I'm sorry..oh god I'm so sorry-"

He glanced, as best he could, at the bloodied piece of wood sticking out from his side. His eyes moved back up to Jean's face. 

He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by a harsh cough racking his body. A sharp cry of pain followed soon afterward as blood dripped down his chin.

Jean gently and carefully lifted him slightly into her arms, elevating his upper body off of the blood-soaked ground.

"It's not your fault," He rasped. "It's not your fault..."

She could suddenly feel the terrifying power creeping back. Her head began to pound as she squeezed her eyes shut, breathing suddenly coming in quick, terrified spurts. 

"No..No-no..Stop it-"

"Go away..go away, please-"

The sudden feeling of a hand on her cheek startled her for a moment, and she was terrified she'd rash out and hurt him even more, if not kill him.

But there was suddenly a strange sensation in her head as the pounding thankfully seemed to subside, and she let her breathing ease itself back to normal.

She looked down at Charles with wide, terrified eyes. His wound had clearly been disturbed by even simply reaching his hand up to touch her. She was able to tell by the tense and uncomfortable look on his face, though he was clearly trying to hide it for her sake. 

"Hank?" He rasped, his hand sliding from her face and resting on her knee.

"I don't know," She replied, voice still shaking from the dangerously close call. "I told Scott to go look for him."

Charles looked worried, then, mistakenly, tried to move himself into a more comfortable position, which only agitated the wound further.

He grunted, body tensing for a short moment as he squeezed his eyes shut.

"I almost killed you.." Jean muttered. "I-I was so close..I could have.."

She lifted her free hand up to her eyes and wiped away at the tears. Charles could practically feel the terror radiating off of her, even without using his powers.

"I'm broken.." She whispered miserably. "I can't even keep the people I love from getting hurt.."

Charles's face softened, despite the amount of agony he had to be in. Having something shoved into your body would definitely not be painless.

"Not being able to control your p-powers does not mean you are broken.." He said, voice tightening as another wave of pain washed over his torso. 

Jean could practically see the memory, when she was only 8, of her and Charles having that conversation just outside of the mansion.

"I break things.."

"Well, if you break things, I can fix them."

"Can you fix me too?"

"No.." Charles said in disbelief, rolling toward her. "No. Because you are not broken."

For once in a long time, she actually smiled.

Jean let out a shuddering breath at the flashback. 

Charles's body suddenly went rigid in her arms as he let out an agonizing yell. Blood seemed to ooze out of where the wood wasn't fully covering, dripping onto the ground. 

"Scott?!" Jean screamed into the woods, praying for an answer. "HANK?!"

At this point she was terrified. Charles wouldn't last much longer and the pain was obviously getting worse.

"Hold on, Professor.." She whispered. "Please.."

Charles looked up at her for a brief moment, before he grunted and squeezed his eyes shut again, fighting against the pain.

Minutes passed, and neither of them had showed up yet.

Charles's face was deadly pale. And his responses were getting slow.

"Professor?" She gently shook him, but was terrified when there was no response.

No—

"Professor!"

A weak moan was the only thing she got out of him. 

Damn it, Scott..Where are you?

Swallowing hard, she held Charles to her chest, as if he'd disappear right then and there if she let go.

He practically raised her. He was a better father than her biological father had ever been. 

She couldn't just watch him die.

Another groan, then his head lolled and rested against Jean's stomach. She could see his eyebrows furrowing and his lips curving into a grimace.

She knew standing up with him would be a bad idea, but if Scott didn't show up soon she'd have to because she was not going to leave him here.

"It'll be okay, Professor.." She tried to reassure the unconscious man. But she was pretty sure she was only trying and failing to reassure herself. "I can't lose you.."

As if by some miracle, the Professor's eyes slowly slid open. He groaned, instinctively trying to shift closer to Jean, which only sent more pain through his body.

"Jean.." He mumbled incoherently. 

She looked down at him. "You're going to be okay.."

He blinked a few times, dazed, before looking back up at Jean.

"N't y'ur fault.." He muttered, the slurring of some of his words indicating he was only getting worse.

She swallowed and nodded, though she didn't really believe that.

His pale and shaking hand reached toward and grabbed hers. He adjusted his grip a few times before squeezing.

"'m s'rry..failed 'ou.." 

"Professor.." Jean muttered, the panic and concern clear in her tone.

"'m okay.." 

"No, you are not even close to being okay. You're dying!" Jean protested.

Charles let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes, which sent instant panic through Jean's spine.

"Stay awake.."

"Still here.." Charles reassured her, though his voice was so weak it was hard to make out.

"Where's Scott..and Ha..Hank..?" He asked, having to stop to catch his breath every few words.

"Something must have happened," Jean said, suddenly overcome with dread. "It's been almost an hour and they still haven't shown up."

After a few more minutes, Jean couldn't take it anymore. Charles's breathing was rapidly increasing and he was trembling pretty badly.

And she was absolutely terrified.

She hugged him to her chest, silent sobs starting to wrack her body as she tried to make the decision of whether to stay here and Charles will probably die in her arms, or lift him and risk hurting him even more and go look for Scott.

Charles's violent cough yanked her out of her thoughts. Blood covered his lips and was dripping down his chin.

"I'm sorry for this.." She muttered, lifting him off the ground as gently as she could.

Charles bit back a cry of pain as the sudden movement aggravated the wound. 

"I'm so sorry-"

"No.." He gasped. "No..it's okay."

She headed off to where she had previously seen Scott disappear to about an hour before. Her concern for Charles was only spiking.

Apparently, he seemed to stay aware enough to know when her powers were starting to go off again. Because he still managed to lift a hand to her face and calm her down.

"Scott?!" She shouted. "Hank?!"

"Over here!" 

Jean felt a huge wave of relief wash over her upon hearing Scott's voice. Though, it was a different situation when she saw Hank trapped under one of the pieces of wood. 

"I need help," Scott pleaded. "He's trapped."

Upon seeing the Professor in her arms, he walked over. "Professor?"

Charles's eyes cracked open. "Scott.."

"Jean, he's in no condition to use his powers right now."

And she knew exactly what that meant.

"N-No..I can't! I-I'll lose control.."

Charles lifted a hand up to her head again, giving a weak, but somehow still reassuring smile. "You'll be alright."

Jean swallowed nervously and closed her eyes. She freed one of her hands, still managing to keep Charles in her grasp, as the large piece of the blown apart wall was lifted off of Hank. He sat up instantly, taking in a fresh breath of air.

She opened her eyes, letting out a relieved breath. 

But she quickly looked back down at Charles, who was looking up at her, but with an almost lifeless expression.

"He needs help.." Jean pleaded as Hank rushed over.

"Oh no.." Hank muttered as he rushed over to Jean. "We need to get him down to my lab."

Jean nodded and soon they were rushing back toward the broken building. Well, one side of it anyway.

"Professor?" Jean asked, trying to make sure he was still there.

She noticed him open his mouth, but only a weak croak escaped as he reached for and grabbed her arm.

"He's not doing too good," Jean said.

"Almost there," Hank said as he threw open the mansion doors.

Once they reached the lab, Hank instantly instructed that they laid Charles on the table, which Jean did, though when she was about to leave so Hank could work, Charles reached out and grabbed her wrist, though his grip was much less steady this time.

"No.." He groaned.

Jean swallowed, then sighed. Apparently he knew she was thinking about leaving, so her and Scott decided to stay.

"I'll have to give him a sedative for this part," Hank said, getting a syringe ready.

Jean nodded. Charles still had a grip on her arm even as Hank was giving him the sedative. Eventually though, his grip released and his arm fell back to the table.

Jean found a chair, sat down, and buried her face in her hands as Hank began to work.


	7. Chapter 7

The next few hours were a rapid blur. Hank, at this point, had managed to safely dislodge the piece of wood from the Professor without causing any major bleeding. Currently, Hank was stitching up the damaged skin.

Scott was sitting next to her, allowing her to rest her exhausted head on his shoulder. There were some points where she had fallen asleep for about 10-30 minutes. 

After a little while more, Jean got up and headed up to Scott’s room to sleep. He had let her have it, since he wasn’t as tired or nearly as stressed as she was at that moment.

Jean was asleep in 5 minutes.

She had no idea what time it was when she woke up. But based on the still pretty-dark skies outside, she guessed it was pretty early.

Yawning, she sat up and rubbed her eyes. She didn’t even bother to get any food and just headed down to the lab. Hank wasn’t there, likely having gone back up to his own room to rest, but Scott was asleep on the floor. Charles was still on the table, his face looking a lot better than it had the previous night.

Jean looked down at Scott and smiled. Gently, she levitated him in the air as she brought over a softer mattress for him to lay on. Thankfully, he didn’t wake up when she laid him back down.

“Jean?”

She turned toward the voice, finding Charles awake and looking at her. 

“Professor,” She said quietly, walking over to the side of the table he was laying on.

Charles groaned quietly, rubbing a hand over his head. “Where’s Hank?”

“Resting, probably,” Jean replied, her eyes drifting up to the ceiling for a moment.

The Professor nodded and looked around, spotting Scott asleep on the floor. His brows raised in surprise for a moment before glancing over at Jean with a knowing look.

Jean could only shrug in response.

“Have you gotten any rest?” Charles asked in concern, clearly knowing pretty well Jean could stay up for absolute ever if she wanted to.

She nodded. “Woke up about 10 minutes ago.”

The sound of footsteps approaching made Jean jump. On instinct, she spun around to defend against whatever attacker dared enter, but it was only Hank.

She relaxed.

“Hey, Hank.”

“Hey,” He greeted, walking over and standing next to Jean. “Hey, Charles. How are you feeling?”

Charles shrugged his shoulders. “Not too great. But better.”

Hank nodded. 

A few hours later, Charles was back in his wheelchair. And the next day they began to fix the damaged mansion.

Jean mostly refrained from helping, but she did help out with levitating a few things. She was still skeptical of her powers.

But as she was helping, her ears suddenly began to ring.

And it was loud.

She gasped and stumbled to her knees, clutching her head as she tried to get the overwhelming pain to disappear.

Scott and Hank took notice and rushed over to her.

“Jean!”

Hank knelt down on her level, grasping her arm.

“Jean. Jean, can you hear me?”

Her eyes drifted over to his face to show that she could hear him. But they quickly closed again as the ringing got worse.

“What’s wrong?” Scott asked worriedly.

“Too loud..” Jean gasped. “My ears are ringing..”

Charles rolled over to them, brows creased in concern. “Jean?”

Jean brought her hands up over her ears. “Make it stop..make it stop..” 

Charles leaned down, reaching his hands out and resting them on both sides of her face. He closed his eyes in concentration. 

A few seconds later, Jean slumped to the ground, eyes drifting closed.

“What’d you do to her?” Scott asked.

“Put her asleep to allow her mind to rest,” Charles replied. “She was under a lot of stress, and her mind is very powerful.”

Scott nodded.

“Hank? Could you and Scott take her inside?”

Hank nodded. Him and Scott both helped lift Jean off of the ground and went to lay her down inside of the mansion.


	8. Chapter 8

Jean woke up to a dull ringing in her head. It took her a while to fully process her surroundings, but when she did, she noticed she was no longer outside.   
  


She assumed Scott and Hank had brought her back into the mansion after she had passed out. Probably on Charles’ wishes.   
  


She sat on the bed for a few moments, waiting until she was more aware of what was going on around her. 

Her door suddenly swung open and she turned in surprise, caught off guard. But she calmed quickly when she realized it was just Scott.

”Hey, Jean,” He said, lowering himself onto the soft mattress next to her.

”Scott,” She greeted with a smile.

”How’d you sleep?” Scott asked in both curiosity and concern. Jean figured he was probably worried after what happened a few hours ago.

”Pretty well, actually. Better than I slept in a while.”

”That’s good.”

”Where’s Hank and the Professor?”

”Outside finishing up repairs,” Scott replied. “They should be done soon. The damage wasn’t as bad as we initially thought.”

Although Jean felt relief from that statement, she still felt horribly guilty that she was the one that caused that damage in the first place.

”I’m awful good at breaking things..”

Scott, sensing the change in mood, turned to her. “No, Jean. You’re you. It wasn’t even your fault.”

”Charles is seriously rich anyway, so he could fix anything that you break.”

The short that came from Jean’s nose was uncalled for, but it quickly escalated into full-blown laughter. Scott grinned, and wasted no time in joining in.

”That’s definitely true,” Jean said, grinning from ear to ear. This was the most laid back she’d felt in a long time, but she was grateful.

Scott pat her shoulder. “Come on. Let’s go see how they’re doing.”

Jean nodded and following Scott outside. Charles and Hank were practically done when they got out there, finishing up the final touches.

Hank was the first to notice their arrival. “Hey, Jean.”

”Hi, Hank,” She replied.

Charles turned his wheelchair around to face them. “How are you feeling?”

”Better than I have in awhile, actually,” She replied honestly. She knew that Charles knew she was being honest judging on the smile that formed on his face.

”How’s it going?” Scott asked.

”We’re pretty much done, if you want to head back inside. I have a feeling the weather is about to get less pleasant,” Hank replied, gazing up at the thick, grey clouds above them.

Scott nodded and lead Jean back into the mansion, Charles and Hank following suit. Once they were inside, Hank shut the large doors, and almost immediately the sound of thunder rang through the air.

”Told you,” Hank chuckled.

”What are you, a weatherman now?” Scott asked.

Hank simply shrugged. “I could be. But I think I’d rather leave that to Storm.”

A smile spread across Jean’s face as she glanced at Scott, who smiled back at her.

It got late after a few hours; and the violent weather was only worsening. Despite knowing that she wouldn’t be able to get much sleep with the loud explosions of thunder bouncing off the walls, Jean headed back to her room anyway to relax. Somehow, she felt unsettled, like something bad was going to take place. But she didn’t know what.

Jean pushed the feeling aside and laid down, somehow managing to drift off to sleep. The dream that followed was not pleasant and she jolted up in the middle of the night with Charles breathing hard at her side.

Blinking repeatedly, she turned her head over to him, eyes widening. “Professor-? I’m sor-“

He shook his head and lowered his hand from his face. “No, it’s alright.”

Jean glanced down toward the ground. “I thought I was doing better.”

”You are,” Charles said, smiling softly at her. “You haven’t been having nearly as many nightmares as before.”

Jean knew that was true, and even felt a small sense of pride. But she knew her struggles were far from over and had a feeling it would get a lot worse.

Charles quickly picked up on this and reached a hand out to her shoulder. “We won’t let it get any worse.”

Jean figured by ‘we’ he meant himself, Scott, and Hank, but part of her figured that she’d be playing a part in this as well.

“But what if it does?” She asked, voice beginning to tremble with the fear of hurting someone again. “What if I lose control and hurt somebody again?”

“You won’t,” Charles replied. 

“How do you know?”

”Because I know you,” Charles said with a smile. “We all do.”

Jean gave a weak smile, but continued to look down at the bed.

Charles squeezed her shoulder. “It’ll be fine. Now try to get some sleep, you need it.”

Jean nodded and laid back down on her bed as Charles rolled out of the room, shutting the door softly behind him.

As soon as her eyelids made contact, she was asleep immediately.


	9. Chapter 9

Jean woke up with a soft gasp. Apparently, she only managed to sneak a few hours of sleep in since she woke up last, as it was still dark out.

Yawning, she sat up and looked out of the window. A sudden bright flash of lighting caught her off-guard and she threw herself backward with a surprised yelp. The weather still hadn’t cleared. Nice.

She slowly opened her door. The hallway lights were dimmed, and it was pretty clear everyone else was still asleep. Rubbing her eyes, she walked up toward the Professor’s room. He was bound to be asleep, but she just wanted to check because she desperately needed somebody to talk to that she could rely on. And someone who understood some of what she was talking about.

Once she was outside the door, she raised her hand to open it, but hesitated. Was this really a good idea? Or was she just going to mess it up again and only irritated Charles for waking him in the early hours of the morning for no reason at all?

She slowly turned the knob to the door as it slowly began to open. To her surprise, there was a dim light on near the back of the room and she could visibly make out the Professor sitting in his wheelchair, writing something.

Jean hesitantly stepped into the room. “Professor?”

Surprised, Charles turned around. “Jean?”

He noticed how sunken her eyes were, like she barely got any sleep, and began to roll over toward her.

”I’m sorry if this is a bad time. It’s early-“

“No, no it’s quite alright,” Charles replied. “Sit down. I couldn’t quite fall asleep either.”

Jean obliged and sat down in the nearest chair.

”Did you sleep at all?” He asked, studying her face. 

“Yeah,” She replied. “A few hours, but apparently it doesn’t look that way.”

“No, it certainly doesn’t,” Charles chuckled softly.

A weak grin made itself evident across Jean’s face, but she lowered her head and it disappeared just as quickly.

”What’s wrong?”

“I just..” Jean paused, her brows creasing. “I feel like a burden..”

”You are not a burden, Jean,” Charles said, almost in disbelief. “What would make you think that?”

”It’s not fair that you guys have to deal with all my problems. I should be doing that.”

Charles shook his head and rolled closer to her. “We aren’t helping you because we have to. We’re helping you because we want to.”

Jean looked up at that, eyes red with the tears that she had been desperately trying to push away.

“I’m sorry,” She said, quickly rubbing at her eyes. “I know I’m a mess right now, I can go-“

She stood up to leave, but Charles grabbed her wrist before she could. “You can go if you wish, but you’re not bothering me. In fact, I’m glad that you’re talking. It’s much easier than keeping it hidden.”

”It’s not like you couldn’t just look inside my head and figure it out yourself,” Jean muttered.

”I would never do that without your knowledge,” Charles replied. 

Jean stared at him for a few more moments before she nodded, then went back to her own room. She reached for the handle, when something suddenly lunged at her from the shadows and slammed her to the ground. She yelled out in surprise as she tried to shove it off her, but it was swinging it’s fists at her wildly.

It took her longer than necessary to realize it was Scott.

”SCOTT-!”

He didn’t respond to his name. She kicked him off, muttering an apology, as she tried to stop him with her telekinesis, but much to her shock and confusion, it didn’t stop him.

Before she could react, she was smashed against the wall, having her head slammed against it violently.

”SCOTT!” She screamed, before darkness began to overwhelm her. “Scott-“ 

She felt something sharp enter her stomach. She didn’t even hear herself scream, as everything faded to black.

When she woke up, the only thing she could process was the pure pain shooting through her body. She noticed that every few seconds, her body gave an involuntary jerk. Turning her head, she could faintly make out the blood starting to pool on the floor.

Whoever it was that attacked her was gone. But whoever it was it was definitely not Scott. He would never do this to her.

The sound of wheels rolling down the hallway caught her attention, but she was too tired to turn her head.

”Oh my god.”

Professor.

Slowly, Jean turned her head to the side, eyes only half-lidded. Charles yelled out for Hank as he rolled toward her.

”Jean!”

The wheelchair came to a halt at her side. Charles quickly locked it in place and leaned down toward her. The next thing she knew, there were footsteps rushing down the hall.

Charles gripped her arm, eyes wide in sudden panic as he took in the state she was in.

”What happened?”

”Something..looked like S-Scott..” She mumbled incoherently. “It h’rts..”

”I know..” Charles rubbed her arm, looking up as he saw Hank rushing toward them, medical kit in hand. “Oh my god, Jean,”

He slid to his knees, grabbing a cloth and pressing it against the rapidly bleeding wound in her stomach.

Jean instantly whimpered, her body giving a small jerk as she gripped Charles’ hand with surprising strength.

Despite the pain radiating through his hand now, Charles squeezed back in return.

”I know, it’s gonna hurt,” Hank told her, a sympathetic look crossing his face as he put more pressure.

“Wh’re Sc’tt?” She asked weakly.

”I’m not sure,” Hank replied. “He wasn’t in his room.”

Dread filled Jean’s stomach.

”You don’t think he..” Hank started, but Charles cut him off with a shake of his head. “He couldn’t have.”

Jean’s body went stiff immediately after she gasped in pain. More blood starting oozing out of the wound.

”She’s losing too much blood,” Hank said in a panic, he pushed down harder.

”Jean,” Charles pleaded. “Jean, stay awake..”

Her eyes were starting to drift close. She was just so tired..

”I know you feel tired, but stay awake..” Charles said, apparently in reply to her thought.

She moaned in pain, fighting to stay awake but she was fighting a losing battle. Her grip on Charles’ hand was starting to slip.

Charles readjusted his grip, his expression only showing more concern.

Hank shook her gently, startling a low groan from the injured girl. “Keep your eyes open, Jean.

She knew she was failing. She just didn’t have the strength to keep her eyes open anymore.

”Jean!”

”’m s’rry..” She mumbled, her eyes barely cracking open to meet Charles’ worried and genuinely scared face.

”Jean, it’s not your fault. It’s not, but don’t—“ He swallowed hard. “You have to stay awake.”

Her eyes slid closed, and then everything went black.


	10. Chapter 10

_Jean slowly opened her eyes, blinking sluggishly. Her body was still in agony, though she was trying to fight through it._

_She lifted her head and suddenly realized that she was still in the hallway of the mansion, a puddle of her own blood still below her._

_As soon as she started looking around, she felt like her heart had stuttered to a stop. Charles’ wheelchair was crushed and he was lying on his stomach on the hard floor, blood covering some of his face and likely other parts of his body, Hank was on her other side, on his back with blood covering almost his entire body. His eyes were open and were gazing unblinking, lifelessly, at the ceiling._

_”No-“ She managed to choke out, despite her aching body screaming in protest. “No..Hank!”_

_Swallowing hard, she turned herself onto her stomach and slowly, weakly, crawled toward Charles._

_Please be alive.._

_Please._

_As soon as she was close enough, she reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling herself closer until she was able to force herself into an upright position._

_A sudden, horrendous image flashed through her head of what must have been what happened while she was out._

_Hank was being thrown violently to the floor, by the same thing that had attacked her, eventually he stopped moving and his eyes were left open lifelessly. Charles had a fist thrown into the side of his face, sending him careening into the wall from his wheelchair. He slid to the floor, looking over at Hank in sudden realization._

_”No-“_

_”HANK!”_

_He grunted, trying to push himself up, but his useless, numb legs brought no help as a foot slammed into his back._

_The Professor yelled out in pain, his gaze drifting over to Jean’s own still body lying on the floor a few feet away. He started to drag himself toward it in a wild desperation, but he only got far enough to extend his arm out and touch her hand before he grew too exhausted to move._

_”Jean..”_

_He swallowed hard, gasping for air as he suffered a rough kick to the neck._

_”J-Jean, please..”  
_

_A kick to the side of the head sent him into darkness._

_Jean gasped, looking at Charles’ motionless body in front of her. She could tell he was still breathing, but she just needed to wake him up._

_”Professor?” She asked, shaking his shoulder. “Professor-“_

_A low groan escaped his throat, his eyes fluttering open weakly but didn’t stay that way for long before they slid shut again._

_She gently flipped him onto his back, his head resting up on her knee._

_”Please wake up..”_

_His eyes cracked open and drifted up to her face._

_”Jean..?” He gasped._

_She nodded. “Yeah..”_

_He grunted, trying to sit up but immediately gasped and yelled out in pain._

_”I-I thought you..” Jean stuttered, glancing between Hank and Charles. “Hank..”_

_”I-I know..” Charles whispered, glancing back up at her. “I know..”_

_Jean suddenly felt an alarming presence behind her. She stiffened, which Charles noticed._

_”No-“ She gasped_

_”Jean?”_

_Her hands suddenly went to her throat involuntary and she was pulled backwards, choking and gasping for air, while thrashing uncontrollably._

_”JEAN-“_

_She was thrown to the ground so hard that she was stunned for a moment, but by the time she got to her feet, that thing was there and already had a gun hovering over Charles’ stomach._

_”Please don’t,” She pleaded. “He’s all I have left.”_

_Charles glanced sideways at her, then up at the thing standing over him._

_Jean could already sense what it was about to do._

_”PLEASE-“_

_Charles looked up at her, his arm slowly stretching out in her direction._

_He opened his mouth to say something._

_BANG_

_”NO!” Jean screamed._

Jean woke up with a violent scream. She felt two pairs of hands pushing her down and 2 different voices repeatedly telling her to calm down.

Tears were already pouring down her face as she covered it with her hands, inhaling a shaky breath and exhaling the same.

”Jean,” Hank said. “Jean, you’re okay.”

She glanced over toward him, her tear-filled eyes widening. “Hank?”

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He noticed that she sounded like she couldn’t believe he was standing there, which he assumed had something to do with her dream.

”You’re alright, Jean. It was just a dream.”

She turned back in the other direction and saw the Professor looking at her in concern from his wheelchair.

”P-Professor?”

“I’m here,” He replied, easily sensing the distress flowing off of her line a wave.

She looked down. “I didn’t mean to-“

”It’s alright,” Hank reassured her. “You didn’t hurt anything.”

“I-I had..I thought-“ She stuttered.

Charles’ face softened. “It was just a dream.”

”It felt so real..”

”I know,” Charles smiled sadly. He knew exactly how nightmares felt and they definitely can get mixed up with reality.

Jean noticed Hank turn toward the door and she followed his gaze, eyebrows furrowing.

”Scott?” He asked. “Where were you?”

Jean had a bad feeling about this. She shuddered, and she felt Charles rest a hand on her shoulder.

”You alright?”

Jean looked over at him, and he must have saw the fear in her eyes because he looked even more concerned.

Scott walked toward them. “Sorry, I was out doing stuff.”

Hank shrugged, and was about to turn back around when Scott suddenly lunged forward, a knife no one even knew he had suddenly appearing as he plunged it into Hank’s chest.

Jean felt like her nightmare just came to life.

”NO!”

”HANK!” Charles’ eyes shot open. His hand instantly went to his head as he tried his best to freeze Scott, or the thing that looked like him anyway.

But like Jean, his telepathy didn’t work on him for some reason.

’Scott’ stepped up to her, looking her dead in the eyes and she could see the utter darkness in them.

“What are you?” Jean asked, voice trembling.

It didn’t answer, and quickly after she heard a choked gasp from beside her.

Her stomach dropped.

”No..”

Turning, she saw Charles leaning over in his wheelchair. There was a decently-sized knife dug in his abdomen, which was dripping blood. He looked up at her, expression filled with a mix of shock, pain, and confusion.

”Jean..”

How did-

She wasn’t even going to ask.

Ignoring the throbbing pain in her stomach, she hopped off the table she was sitting on and slid to her knees in front of the wheelchair just as he toppled forward.

She caught him, her breathing rate suddenly increasing in panic because Charles had been stabbed and he was all she had left because she let hank die-

“No..No no no-“ She sobbed, pulling him into her arms. “Professor, please-“

She gripped the hilt of the knife, pulling it out as gently as she could and immediately covering the wound with her hand.

Charles groaned in pain, tensing up as soon as she applied pressure.

”I know..” Jean’s voice was shaking horribly. “Y-You’ll be fine..”

He looked up at her, chest rising and falling way too fast for her liking.

“Please-“ 

She let out a broken sob, pressing down a bit harder on the bleeding wound. Her hand was covered in blood by this point.

”J-Jean..” He gasped, hand grappling for hers.

”I’m sorry..” Jean sobbed, gripping his hand back in return. “I’m so sorry..”

”It’s...” Charles gasped, coughing violently. “It’s alright..” 

He squeezed his eyes shut, yelling out in sudden pain.

”Professor-“

She noticed the bleeding was only getting worse, and his quick breathing was starting to slow down dramatically.

She held him tighter, looking up in complete hatred at the figure standing over them.

”GET AWAY!” She screamed. Without even doing anything, the figure was sent back a surprising distance, flying right through the wall.

Though, Jean quickly broke down sobbing again. If she lost Charles she had no idea what she would do.

”I can’t lose you..” She choked. “Please, I can’t lose you-“

Charles looked up at her, expression tightened with pain.

His other hand lifted up and rested on top of her own, the one she was currently using to put pressure on his wound.

And then his eyes started to slide closed and Jean felt the worst fear she’s ever felt in her life.

”No-Professor,” She shook him. “Please, no. Stay awake..please stay awake..”

His eyes slowly slid back open, blinking sluggishly.

”This is all my fault..” She choked. “This is all my fault.”

”No, it’s not..” Charles gasped. “It’s not your fault...”

”I should have did something..” She said. “Now Hank’s dead and you’re dyi—“

She didn’t even want to say the word.

“I’m not going to—“ Charles coughed, then swallowed as his grip on Jean’s hand tightened. “I’m not going to leave you..”

”How can you know?”

”Because I won’t let it happen..” Charles rasped with a weak and bloodied smile.

Jean’s eyes widened slightly at that.

She turned and used her powers to bring the med kit that Hank had used prior over to them. She opened it quickly and got out some gauze, lifting him up slightly so she could wrap it around his abdomen.

He groaned in pain, squeezing his eyes shut as he fought against the agony.

Jean finished wrapping it, immediately looking upward and saw ‘Scott’ standing there again.

“What do you want?” She asked desperately. “Just leave us alone!”

She cast a side glance at Hank’s motionless body, swallowing hard.

Once again, Scott didn’t reply. He lifted his hand, and she suddenly felt a strong force pulling at her.

”Wait, no-“

She grunted, lifting one of her hands from the Professor’s chest and wrapping it around the table leg behind her.

And then she felt something intrude her mind. And it wasn’t Charles.

Her hand flew to her head. “Get out-“

The creature only stared harder, and the pounding in her head got louder.

”Stop-“

”Jean-Jean, what’s wrong?”

She gripped her head, feeling the tears stinging her eyes. “GET OUT OF MY HEAD-“ She buried her head in her hands.

Charles’ pained expression shifted into sudden concern. He glanced toward the figure of Scott standing above them, then back at Jean, who was holding her head painfully.

He shakily reached his hand up to her face, resting it on her own hand as he closed his eyes.

Jean gasped, feeling the pressure suddenly start to fade from her head, and the thing that was trying to get in was blocked out. But it wasn’t by her.

She cautiously opened her eyes, blinking away her tear-filled vision.

”Professor?”

He opened his eyes and let his hand fall away from her face, casting a reassuring smile.

She let out a sigh of relief, rubbing the side of her head. “Thanks..”

Her head jerked up in alarm when she sensed something flying toward her. A large, sharp knife nearly smashed into her face, but stopped mere inches from her eye.

Scott looked alarmed for a moment, but otherwise remained calm.

Even Charles looked surprised, watching as the knife hovered mid-air in front of Jean’s face.

Her eyes suddenly turned a cosmetic shade of orange.

”Your mistake.”

The knife turned itself around and flew toward Scott at lightning speed, slamming into his chest with such force that he was knocked to the ground.

Her eyes slowly returned to their normal shade of blue.

She watched in surprise as Scott got to his feet, easily pulling the knife from his chest. The wound was healed over immediately.

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Yeah, definitely not Scott.

”Your mistake,” He repeated, his voice showing no emotion.

The knife disappeared, and at first Jean was confused. And then realization crossed her face.

Her eyes faded back into the orange, but it wasn’t enough, the knife that was flying toward her back dug into it.

Her back arched and she opened her mouth in a silent scream.

”JEAN-“ Charles’ eyes shot open.

She nearly fell backward, but she slammed her hand into the leg of the table behind her.

The pain slowly started to fade away though, and she sat herself up, her eyes changing back to the cosmetic orange as the knife faded away as well.

She carefully helped Charles sit up, then slowly got to her feet herself.

She raised her hand, a similar orange aura to the one in her eyes surrounding it as she flicked her finger. ‘Scott’ came flying at her and she quickly stepped out of the way, yanking him back and sending him in the opposite direction and into the wall.

He got up pretty quickly, and suddenly he was flying toward her. Her eyes went wide in surprise but she opened her hands and threw them out in front of her. And in a few seconds he was gone.

She relaxed, allowing herself to calm down her eyes returned to their normal blue shade.

As she was walking back toward Charles, she felt a sudden stab in her head and let out a sudden yell of pain before she fell to the floor.

”Jean!”

She tried to get back up, but her world faded into darkness.


	11. Chapter 11

She blinked her eyes open sluggishly, almost immediately remembering the events that happened prior and pushing herself off the ground.

Her head was throbbing.

Groaning, she lifted her hand up to her head, rubbing it gently.

”Jean?”

She turned her head at the voice. Charles was still sat up where she left him, looking at her in concern.

”What happened?” She muttered.

”You passed out,” Charles replied.

Jean’s brows furrowed in confusion. She could faintly make out the fight she had just prior to suddenly falling to the ground and blacking out, but not much after that.

”Are you okay?” Charles asked.

Jean nodded. Her eyes caught Hank’s body and she instantly tore them away, feeling the tears filling her eyes again.

Scott was probably dead too. He would have shown up by now.

Charles really was all she had left.

Even though she knew that for a while, it still hit her like a freight train.

She stood up, walking over to Charles, when she was suddenly hit with a barrage of images and noise.

_”No-wait,” Scott pleaded at the figure in front of him. “Let me go.”_

_The creature smiled. “I will.”_

_Its fist suddenly shifted into a long, pointed knife._

_”WAIT-“_

_The creature slammed its long, pointed hand through Scott’s chest. He coughed, gagging and choking for air as blood rushed down his front, before falling to his knees and then hitting the ground with a thud._

_He was dead._

Jean gasped, tears making themselves evident on her face. She stumbled into the side of the table, hand over her mouth.

”Jean?” Charles asked. “Jean, are you alright?”

”Scott..” She gasped. “Scott‘s dead.”

Charles’ eyes widened. Usually, he was able to feel when one of them had lost their life, but this time he had no idea Scott had been killed.

Jean slowly slid to the ground beside the Professor, breaths coming out in short spurts. She turned and dug her face into Charles’ shoulder.

His face fell. He knew how much Scott had meant to her, and he figured she knew he was dead anyway, but actually having it confirmed was worse.

He placed his arms around her back. “I’m sorry..”

Jean sobbed. She felt like she was being torn apart from the inside. It was a horrible feeling.

She sat there for what seemed like hours, clinging to the Professor like a lifeline, as if she’d drown and lose herself if she let go.

Charles, who was just terribly patient, sat there with her, rubbing comforting circles on her back.

“Why is this happening..” Jean croaked.

Charles just shook his head. “I don’t know..” His grip tightened as he looked over at Hank’s body. “I don’t know..”

After a few more minutes, Jean pulled back and sat up beside Charles, rubbing her face.

She opened her mouth, but froze. Her eyes drifted toward the entrance of the lab, where she spotted two figures that resembled the previous.

“Professor..”

”What is it-“ He caught on pretty quickly, following Jean’s gaze.

Her eyes narrowed and she got to her feet, but as soon as she did, shackles appeared on both her wrists and feet and she tripped, landing face-first on the floor.

She grunted, thrashing around violently. “LET ME GO!”

As soon as she tried to use her powers, a sudden shock was sent through her body and she jerked, coughing and gasping.

”Jean!”

One of the figures made its way toward Charles, sharp knife in hand.

”NO!” Jean screamed. “Leave him alone!”

The creature smiled at her, inching closer and closer toward Charles.

Jean felt a sudden power rush through her body. The electricity had no affect as the bonds were completely shattered.

The creature threw the knife, aimed right for Charles’ chest.

She threw her hand up, the knife coming to a halt mid-air.

She grunted, struggling to keep it in its place as the creature pushed harder.

Jean was so focused on the conflict she, herself was in, that she didn’t notice the creature raising a gun in the background.

And a few seconds later a gunshot rang out, nauseating her for a few moments before she came back to reality.

She was confused. Clearly, she hadn’t been struck-

No.

Oh, gods no-

She heard a strangled gasp from behind her, then a loud wheeze as the person tried desperately to bring in a breath.

Jean spun around instantly, rushing to Charles’ side for the second time.

How could she have let this happen?

”NO!” She gasped, eyes quickly filling with tears as she tried in vain to stop the bleeding.

She pulled him into her arms, her whole body trembling in fear.

Though, he knew he wasn’t going to survive this. His mutation wasn’t super healing.

She wished it was.

”Professor,” She choked. “Professor, don’t do this. Please don’t do this..”

He coughed blood from his mouth, his lips trembling as he tried to make out words.

“J-J-Jean..” 

Jean sobbed, clutching tightly onto Charles, terrified that he was going to disappear. And he was.

That was inevitable at this point.

His shaking hand reached up to her face and she instantly covered it with her own. 

“I’m sorry!” She sobbed. “I’m so sorry..”

Charles wheezed, his chest heaving as he desperately tried to focus on her face.

He groaned, his body visibly trembling.

”I can’t lose you, too!” Jean pleaded. “You’re all I have left..please-“

She sounded so broken that Charles didn’t even know if he could take it. It hurt him way more than the actual wounds he had were hurting him.

”I-I’m s-sorry..” Charles gasped. “I-I-“

The strength from his body was draining way faster than he thought it should. He was tired, and his eyes were staring to slip closed.

”Stay awake..” Jean begged. “Please..please stay awake..”

“I can’t..” Charles groaned, his head lolling weakly to the side. His free hand reached out and wrapped around Jean’s own. 

“Please..” Jean sobbed.

Charles was fully aware of how he could barely breathe. Every breath was like he just ran a marathon.

Jean didn’t really care about her biological father after finding out about what he had said, losing Charles would be nearly 100 times worse than that.

His breathing slowed dramatically and he was unable to fully open his eyes. He kept his gaze glued to her for as long as he could muster.

Jean noticed how his eyes were starting to shut, but he kept fluttering them open in a desperate attempt to stay awake.

“I’m going to be all alone..” Jean sobbed. “Please..I need you-“

“Y-You w-won’t be a-alone..” He replied, breath hitching. “Y-You won’t be...”

His hand started to slide from her face.

”No-“

”It’s alright..” He looked up at her, his expression awfully soft for the amount of pain he was currently in.

and god, she didn’t deserve this.

A soft smile spread across his face as he reached his trembling hand back up to her face. Almost immediately, she could faintly hear his weak message at the back of her mind and almost wished she didn’t.

”I love you.”

Her eyes shot open, the tears only coming out in greater quantities.

”Professor..”

His hand stayed up on her face for a few moments before it slowly slid back down, landing at his side with a small thump as his eyes rolled to the back of his head.

As soon as she saw his chest go still, she felt like her entire world just fell out from beneath her. But his last words were imprinted in her mind forever.

“I love you.”

How could anybody love her? She didn’t deserve it. Apparently Charles always thought she did. And in the end it got him killed-

A broken, miserable sob tore out of her throat as she clutched him to her chest and cried, blocking out the rest of the world.


End file.
